Hey gang, how are ya’all? Hope everyone had a fabulous Easter and that
you’re enjoying your April immensely!
So, I’m here today to
ask a question that has been weighing heavily on me. What the hell does “never” mean? And why does it not appear to mean the same
thing to everyone? Maybe you’ve noticed
it, maybe you haven’t. But I have, and
it’s driving me freaking crazy!
Okay, let me explain
what I mean.
Have you set up a new
online account using Chrome as your browser recently? If so, you may recall that you provided an
appropriate User ID, and supplied a secure and “secret” password. Do you remember Chrome asking if you want it
to remember your password for you?
Yeah, I see you nodding.
So…if you’re like me,
you are paranoid about ANYONE knowing your password—even Chrome. Especially Chrome. Like me, you hit the option “Never Save Password”. Did you ever think about what that meant?
If we are talking about
one password (this password), then the option doesn’t make sense to me. If I’m setting up a new password, it is only a
“new” password one time. And most sites
will not allow you to reuse that same password again. So, when would “Never Save Password” ever
apply in the case where it is singular and referring only to this password? Never, by its very nature, implies the
situation will repeat itself and you must decide now for all future iterations.
Are you following
me? I hope so.
On the flip side, what if
they used poor grammar and really meant to say, “Never Save Passwords”?
In that case, I would expect to never
see the question again. How long? NEVER!
NEVER EVER!
Alas, I have seen the
question every stinking time I set up a new account. So, is the error in the grammar of the option
or is there another meaning implied? What
does NEVER mean to Google? Exactly.
Because I can tell you
it doesn’t seem to be the same as what it means to me.
Here’s another example—junk
mail. Ever find important email from
someone (in my case, my publisher) in your Junk Mail folder? More than once? Like a million times?
Yeah, me too. I click on the email and select the option “Not
Junk” and it gets moved to my Inbox, only to have the next email from the same
sender go to the Junk Mail folder again. Okay, I get it. I didn’t give them any rules beyond this one particular
piece of email.
So, the next time I
find an important message in the Junk Mail folder, I now select “Never block
messages from this sender”. There’s that
word again—never. At this point, any
reasonable person would assume the function that manages this option has the
ability to never block these messages.
Why offer if they can’t do it?
Did it work?
Noooo…it did not. Email from that same sender at that same
email address from the same IP address will again show up in your Junk Mail
folder. It is inevitable. And you will again be offered the same
ability to Never block messages from this sender.
Seriously?
So, what the hell does “never”
mean to the people who developed these functions? Does it mean maybe never? Sometimes?
Intermittently? Always? Or only if the moon is green and the sky
turns purple on a day of the week that ends in “m”?
Because it appears that
ALL
of these definitions apply—at least, in someone’s world. Not in mine, but in someone’s.
And I can guarantee you
that Chrome will offer yet one more time and your email will end up in Junk
Mail yet again on the day that a green moon in a purple sky shines over a day
of the week ending in “m”!
Who the hell thunk that
up?
That’s my story, quirky
and questioning, and I’m stickin’ to it.
Hang on tight now, ‘cuz we’re gonna go real, real fast!
Love ya,
Kayce
